What To Do When the Gossip Is About You

Posted by Joseph D. Lento | Jan 18, 2022 | 0 Comments

Graduate-level programs tend to be small, insular, and highly competitive. While students in these programs often become friends and colleagues that can last for a lifetime, a small circle of folks who are studying the same subjects can breed high-stakes competition and bitter rivalry. In that contentious atmosphere, gossip easily flourishes—and never more so than when one of the graduate students has been accused of cheating or another type of academic misconduct.

Admit it: you've probably gossiped about fellow students, whether during your undergraduate years or as a graduate student. But have you ever wondered what it's like when you're the target of the scuttlebutt? Should you find yourself in this unfortunate situation, here are some tips on how to survive.

Guilty or Not, Here They Come

In many ways, it doesn't really matter whether you have actually committed the act of misconduct of which you've been accused. After all, the truth of a rumor doesn't generally factor into the amount of gossip it engenders. People are going to talk, and they're going to speculate, and plenty of them probably won't believe anything you have to say after the whispering has begun.

So, a few rules apply, no matter what, and no matter whether you are a MBA, medical, law, or any other graduate or professional-level student.  Let's take a look at them:

  • Don't discuss the issue. Refrain from fueling the rumor mill by talking about your case in public forums. Don't even deign to deny the allegations, even if you are categorically innocent. No matter what you say, the very act of addressing the rumors will only feed them and give the gossips more to discuss. If someone presses you to respond or react, it's fine to be blunt but polite. Simply say, “I'm not going to discuss that; please respect my decision and my privacy.” From then on, you can feel free to ignore additional queries or change the subject.
  • Hold your head high. Even if you do have something to be ashamed about, don't let it show. Walk with confidence and hold your head high. Revealing your guilt or shame, getting emotional, or acting inappropriately during class and on campus is, again, only going to give the Chatty Cathy's more to talk about. And chances are the talk won't be about how bad they feel for you or how bursting into tears in the cafeteria is probably a sign that you're innocent.
  • Concentrate on your studies. Is there ever a good time for a grad student to slack off? If there is, this definitely isn't it. Abandoning your academics will send a message that you're giving up—maybe because you're guilty. So, keep your head down and your nose to the grindstone.
  • Carefully choose your confidants. Unless you trust a fellow grad student with your life, keep quiet even in private. It's a good idea to talk to someone about your troubles to ensure your own emotional well-being, but that person has to be trustworthy. Turn to one of your parents, your BFF, or a therapist. It may be tempting to vent to someone in your program. But don't give in; you'll regret it.

Lastly, But Importantly, Get Legal Help

Charges of academic misconduct can be devastating to your graduate degree, your future career, and your reputation. This is true, unfortunately, whether you have committed the alleged misconduct or not. Seeking legal help is not an admission that you are guilty. In fact, it might be the only thing that can save your bacon in this situation.

If you have any questions about the disciplinary process or want to discuss your situation, give attorney Joseph D. Lento and the Lento Law Firm a call at 888-535-3686. We're here to help, and we'll support you through the whole process.

About the Author

Joseph D. Lento

"I pride myself on having heart and driving hard to get results!" Attorney Joseph D. Lento passionately fights for the futures of his clients nationwide. Attorney Lento and his team represent students and others in disciplinary cases and various other proceedings at colleges and universities across the United States. Attorney Lento has helped countless students, professors, and others in academia at more than a thousand colleges and universities across the United States, and when necessary, he and his team have sought justice on behalf of clients in courts across the nation. He does not settle for the easiest outcome, and instead prioritizes his clients' needs and well-being. Joseph D. Lento is licensed in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York, is admitted pro hac vice as needed nationwide, and he can help you or your student address any school-related issue or concern anywhere in the United States.


There are no comments for this post. Be the first and Add your Comment below.

Leave a Comment

Contact Us Today!


If you, or your student, are facing any kind of disciplinary action, or other negative academic sanction, and are having feelings of uncertainty and anxiety for what the future may hold, contact the Lento Law Firm today, and let us help secure your academic career.

This website was created only for general information purposes. It is not intended to be construed as legal advice for any situation. Only a direct consultation with a licensed Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York attorney can provide you with formal legal counsel based on the unique details surrounding your situation. The pages on this website may contain links and contact information for third party organizations - the Lento Law Firm does not necessarily endorse these organizations nor the materials contained on their website. In Pennsylvania, Attorney Joseph D. Lento represents clients throughout Pennsylvania's 67 counties, including, but not limited to Philadelphia, Allegheny, Berks, Bucks, Carbon, Chester, Dauphin, Delaware, Lancaster, Lehigh, Monroe, Montgomery, Northampton, Schuylkill, and York County. In New Jersey, attorney Joseph D. Lento represents clients throughout New Jersey's 21 counties: Atlantic, Bergen, Burlington, Camden, Cape May, Cumberland, Essex, Gloucester, Hudson, Hunterdon, Mercer, Middlesex, Monmouth, Morris, Ocean, Passaic, Salem, Somerset, Sussex, Union, and Warren County, In New York, Attorney Joseph D. Lento represents clients throughout New York's 62 counties. Outside of Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York, unless attorney Joseph D. Lento is admitted pro hac vice if needed, his assistance may not constitute legal advice or the practice of law. The decision to hire an attorney in Philadelphia, the Pennsylvania counties, New Jersey, New York, or nationwide should not be made solely on the strength of an advertisement. We invite you to contact the Lento Law Firm directly to inquire about our specific qualifications and experience. Communicating with the Lento Law Firm by email, phone, or fax does not create an attorney-client relationship. The Lento Law Firm will serve as your official legal counsel upon a formal agreement from both parties. Any information sent to the Lento Law Firm before an attorney-client relationship is made is done on a non-confidential basis.